Online Love Market

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Me: "Thank you for my roommies who run when the lords great word comes'a knocking at our door."

I've read about Mormons before, and I know everything about them. These fucking people believe that "The Great Word" was written by the Ancient Americans and hidden in scriptures to be found by some lunatic named John. There was no way in hell that I could keep a straight face while having these "facts" repeated to me, especially when the only "Great Word" I was sober enough to understand at the time was "Fuck".

Omari versus the Ferret

I get off of work, and it is decided that we're going to church. Not just any church, but a church that has been converted into a nightclub. Each room is designed by a different artist. The place is friggin' huge, and overall, it puts Spice Bar to shame. You will seriously get lost in this place during your first visit. It is just that huge. Enter BoMA Nightclub.

Puerto Rico and I immediately start downing shots of Goldschlager back to back to back. Little by little, we begin drinking away our cash. Fresh leaves us with his girl from out of town. Probably not a good idea. We never hit on her, but that doesn't mean we weren't being attention whores. We were doing everything we could to make her laugh and smile. While he was outside smoking, she was inside having a blast with us. And to quote her:

Townie: "You guys are so much fun! I wish I could take you two back home with me! Guys like you simply don't exist where I'm from."

The difference between us and other guys, is that while other guys are too busy worrying about what everyone thinks of them, we're out doing whatever it takes to have fun, not giving a shit about what anyone thinks or has to say.